This week there were two instances in which I jumped to the wrong conclusions. In one case, I wrote an email to the person that I had thought wronged me. I wrote that I would be dan lechaf zechut and assume that I was unaware of the true facts. The person wrote back that, indeed, I didn't have full knowlege of what had transpired. Thankfully, a quarrel has been prevented.
A while later I received an email from the Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation.
To register to receive a lesson a day, email alessonaday@chofetzchaimusa.org.
The following is an excerpt from the email.
The Torah states:”With righteousness shall you judge your fellow” (Vayikra 19:15), which our Sages interpret as a commandment to give one’s fellow the benefit of the doubt (Shevuos 30a). This precept is among those “whose fruit one enjoys in this world and whose principal reward is preserved for the World to Come” (Shabbos 127a). Development of this trait is crucial for perfecting the quality of Shmiras haloshon.
To give one’s fellow the benefit of the doubt is to decide in one’s mind that someone who is said to have committed a misdeed did so either unwillfully, out of ignorance, or correctly (i.e. that, in fact, a sin has not been committed). When the report does not lend itself to any of the above interpretations, one should consider the possibility that the speaker added or omitted details which completely alter the nature of the report.
To judge others favorably is also to bear in mind the teaching: ”Do not judge your fellow until you have reached his place” (Avos 2:5).
The more one accustoms himself to judge others favorably, the less he will transgress the sin of loshon hora.
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