"Where does it say that you have a contract with G-d to have an easy life?"the Lubavitcher Rebbe"Failure is not the enemy of success; it is its prerequisite."Rabbi Nosson Scherman
Why still grope in the dark? Here is the link:http://secretofbereshit.blogspot.com/The blog has 2 books titled "Book of Secrets of Creation / Sefer Sod Bereshit". It is the stone with 7 eyes in front of Joshua. It contains the secrets of the 7 days of creation. It will give light to the world.